25 February 2008

and life goes on...

Yes, life does go on. On and on. It pulls you away in one direction after another. And you just feel like you've been swept this way and that.

Settling into life in an alien country is quite an experience. Back home, everyone knows you. They've seen you act, sing, play the tabla. They've known you for the person you are. Some of them respect you even. A few might even look up to you. Then you get uprooted and put in a new place where no one knows you. Where they don't know your culture. Where India means Abu from the simpsons. Where 17 year olds start putting you down cause you can't be bothered to indulge in polite banter. Cause they think they know more than you. Kids!

And then you realize that life goes on. That you've experiened this all your life in a milder form. You experienced it when you left Moern School and went to St. Stephen's College. Nothing's ever come easy to you in life, there's no reason it should come easy now. You'll just have to work at it, slowly but surely. You'll have to attend auditions and get rejected by people you know you've done more theatre than. Not their fault that you have brown skin, though. You just don't get roles meant for white people. It's okay. You move on. You keep trying.

Rowing has been killing. As has theatre. I landed a lead in Indian Ink (Stoppard), and everyone who saw it loved it. And loved me in it. Nice bunch of people to work with. Cast party in 2 days. Looking forward to it. And now a few people know I can act. Thats a good thing.

And some of the people here are nice. They tell me I go on and on and on about India, but its difficult not to. I mean, you don't ever see the sun in this country. Its so cold and drab. And people here are so stiff. Buried under so many layers. But they're nice people, all. Different from what I'm used to, but nice. I've got a few of them interested in India even.

Yes, life goes on. And you realize that you must go on with it. Work hard with what it throws at you and learn to be content with what you get from it. Life has changed in so many ways over the last year. It all seems too quick. But I'm trying to move on. I AM moving on...

PS. to a certain JitterBug. It hurts, I know. I was hurt too. But you must move on. It takes time, it takes effort, but you MUST...


  1. Ah you are back.
    I was wondering why I was commented on!

  2. David and Elie7 March 2008 at 20:50

    1.) We're not stiff, you are!
    2.) We can't believe you pulled the race card! It IS your fault you're brown, and you should be ashamed.

    PS Don't be sad. Elie's always there to comfort you, and loves you very much. David tolerates you. So cheer up.

  3. Oh come on Saattvic! I've spent the last two and a half years telling people how easy it is for Indians to adjust to England and Oxford ... how can we have such diametrically opposite views?

    Learn to love the English (and other Europeans). Maybe they have slightly different approaches to social interaction, but they aren't stiff. They're certainly more flexible on most things than some people I can think of!

    Stop moaning about the weather. You've just had three weeks of great sunshine. You wait until June. In fact the perfect antidote to your troubles is probably just to fly home in July, that will teach you to appreciate a temperate climate!

    As for the gripe that no one knows you, can I just say - that's called entering the real world!

    By the way, I have two books about England that you will enjoy, remind me to give them to you.

  4. And when 17-year-olds put you down it's because you are OLD, not because you are in England! Yoof culture, innit?