31 October 2006

Egg after 10 years

My life has changed forever.

Yesterday at the gym, the conversation veered towards diet. The trainer, on hearing my diet, proclaimed, "It's bad enough that you're a vegetarian. But you don't eat egg? You'll have to atleast eat egg, or else you'll never get enough protien to build muscle." I said, "But I haven't eaten egg in 10 years. Mera dharm bhrasht ho jayega. I can't eat egg. Can't I make do with soya and dal?" "No," came the prompt reply, "either you eat egg or you forget about building muscle. That's it. 6 eggs a day."

6 EGGS A DAY?????

EGGS????

Help...

I came back home and my brother wouldn't stop teasing me about it. After all, I'm entirely responsible for converting 75% of my family into vegetarians.

This morning, dad volunteered to make me an omelette. "2 eggs", I said. So he made this huge fat omelette with 2 eggs and set it in front of me. "Where's the camera, Saattvic? I need to capture this. This is a historic moment." "It's out of battery", I lied.

Then my eyes slid down towards my plate. And the omelette. I stared at it. For what must have been 3 whole minutes. What I was about to eat were the beginnings of an animal. That's close enough to an actual animal to make me want to throw up. I looked at the mangled mass of white, yellow and brown and considered giving up gymming.

Dad looked at me with amusement and said, "just do a 1-2-3 and get over with it." "Ya", I said, and cut a piece off with my fork. I lifted it up to eye level, and stared. I knew it would be difficult. Then I closed my eyes and thought "you'll never get through it this way." So, without thinking about it any further, I shoved it into my mouth. Memories of 10 years ago flooded back. I recognized the taste at once. I managed to struggle through it with great difficulty, fighting back strong urges to vomit every other second.

Dad looked at me expectantly, telepathically asking me "how was it?"

"It's got too much salt."

12 comments:

  1. For the record, eggs we eat are not the starting point of another life. If you insist, then so are seeds. And so goes the usual argument about non-vegetarianism... But the idea is to enjoy what you eat. Remember how you started off with Pizza, or Paneer?

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  2. Well technically you're not killing any animal as the eggs are produced from artificial fertilization or something like that...

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  3. Well, in that case, milk is also not truly vegetarian.

    some interesting reading here...
    http://www.ivu.org/faq/eggsdairy.html

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  4. Ah Sattvic, vanity over principle? I thought better of you...

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  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  6. ya, well...

    seeds become plants. and plants have no nervous system.

    milk does not directly become an organism, eggs do.

    artificial fertilization happens mostly in western developed countries.

    but i get your point. it's a mental thingy, that's all. eating eggs reminds me of non-veg food. ans it leaves a distinctly non-veg-like aftertaste as well.

    misha, i've not compromised my principles!!! eggs are not non vegetarian!!!

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  7. Sounds like youre trying to convince yerself too.

    hey I dont mind!

    The chickens might not like you much tho...

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  8. Fall of the last bastion.... Aa-men! And a good deal more interesting than the ICC matches!

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  9. hahhaaaaaa...!!!!!!!u eaT EGG!!!!LALALLALALAAAAAAAAAAA...lol..

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  10. well if it makes you feel any better then know that those chickens live a life of luxury. they are taken care of all their lives..their eggs are taken good care of,they never hav to worry about looking for food or looking out for preditors.the walls they live within give them shelter from all the seasons.and im pretty sure they have some sort of intricate social system. and to think of it there are millions of people who go hungry every night.im sure many would be more than willing to trade places with those chickens.
    so you see it really isnt all that bad.

    manan

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  11. Listen dodo, poultry eggs won't hatch even if u keep them 4 a million years. 'Cuz they are "the chicks who didn't get their father's affection". Got it?

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  12. Listen to Abhinandan. Chickens will lay eggs whether they have been fertilised or not. Any egg you buy in a store will not have been fertilised, and cannot EVER become a living animal. (Really. If you don't believe us, try sitting on one until it hatches. Really.)

    If you wish not to eat eggs because they come from animals, please note that Amit is right: milk is just as much an animal product. Be consistent. Nothing is more annoying than Hindu hypocrisy.

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